Because of all these little suckers floating around in my eyes, I have to go to my world-renowned ophthalmologist once a year so he can make sure my retina isn't detached. And every year, he gives me the same answer.
It's not detached, it's just more of a loner. BAM! I'll be here all week.
Anyway, in order to do the exam he has to dilate my eyes. An assistant comes in and puts two drops of the dilating elixir into each eye. I think one of the main ingredients is gasoline because that's what it feels like.
Once my eyes - or anyone's eyes - are dilated, they let in a whole lot of light and there's nothing you can do about it. Usually I get this exam during the day, and I have to wear three pairs of sunglasses (not kidding) to reduce the light coming into my eyes so I can see well enough to drive home.
But since this time the exam was at night, I thought I could get away with not wearing them.
So you're asking, "How'd that work out for ya?"
This is what every headlight looked like on the way home. Each one was a starburst, and every lamp shining from a lamp post looked like fireworks. It was very pretty. I think they design it that way because they know it may be the last thing you ever see as you go careening out of control across four lanes into other cars on the freeway.
The good news is it eventually wears off in about four or five hours, and then once again I'm able to see things as they really are.
Which, as anyone who knows me will tell you, was never a strong suit of mine to begin with.
