Doesn't make scents

As any dog owner will tell you, the picture to the left is of an unfortunate necessity if you're ever planning on taking Rags out of the house.

I refer of course to poop bags.

Now, this isn't the first time I've mentioned poop bags. I also alluded to them in this post.

But it's time to, um, dig deep and discuss them in more detail.

If you know anything about me - and really, can anyone know anything about anyone? - you know I'm not a perfume-y kind of guy. I use unscented deodorant. My clothes are washed in unscented Tide detergent. And I don't ever wear men's cologne, at least not since Calvin Klein One went to $69 an ounce (Purity. Unity. Sensuality.).

But I believe if there's one thing that should be strongly scented, it's poop bags. Granted, no matter what bag you use it's a losing battle. Even the unscented bags wind up with a scent, although it's definitely not the scent of choice. And the scented ones always wind up giving up the fight because they aren't scented enough to completely cover the scent they need to.

But at least they try. I file it - figuratively - under "better than nothing."

We can put a man on the moon, the government can listen to every call ever made and I can turn a Zip Lock bag upside down and nothing spills out. Is it too much to ask for a poop bag to completely mask the unpleasant fragrance of a healthy diet and a job well done?

It's my hope somewhere scientists are working on this.

And without getting too detailed, while they're at it, if they could look into shaping the bags like gloves it would make doing our, um, duty as owners a lot easier.

Maids' day off

The living room is a little out of control. So is the bedroom, the hallway and the garage.

It's not for lack of good intentions, and it's no one's fault. It's just that there's life in progress. In fact, there are four of them in progress. And sometimes, in the ebb and flow of volleyball games, client meetings, board meetings, jazz concerts, getting some writing done and walking the dog, cleaning up a bit as you go gets bounced to the bottom of the To Do list.

Of course, like everyone, we do have a threshold. We measure it with those sticks they use in the south every time a river overflows its banks. When it gets to three feet, we stop every thing and clear the battlefield.

Like some people, we have a housekeeper that helps us stay on top of it. Well, she tries. Honestly, she's not very good. On days she's here, we come home to dirty dishes in the sink, unfolded laundry on the couch and cleaning rags on the washer as opposed to in it. Instead of cleaning for the maid, we have to clean after the maid.

Suffice it to say she's not here for the long haul.

I recognize it's a first-world problem, and that families all over the world are struggling with far more serious and pressing issues than a clean house. I see stories about it all the time on the TV.

That is, I would. If I could see the TV.