I’m not sure, but I think 2000 is the crown-of-diamonds anniversary.
Last week, a piece of papyrus was discovered. On it, Jesus is quoted as saying the words “My wife…” But then, the paper cuts off.
Cue the media frenzy.
“Was Jesus married?” the pundits were asking. Or even worse, stating as fact.
The answer of course is no, he wasn’t. So I hope you kept the receipt for that crock pot.
The fabric it’s written on, much less the statement itself, strike more than a few theological investigators as suspicious since this “discovery” just came to light. The truth is, as Jon Stewart showed last week, Jesus could’ve been saying virtually anything:
But I think to discover the real reason Jesus wasn't married, you have to turn to a preacher. Or former one. That's why I think Sam Kinison has the real reason - by the way, this clip is NOT suitable for younger viewers (surprise!):
And if it turns out he was married, all I can say is I hope she gets along with the in-laws.
