That joyful time of year when we count our blessings. Gather with our loved ones. Celebrate tradition. Exchange presents.
And plan for our own inevitable death.
Years ago my darling wife and I drew up wills and a living trust. But with the new estate tax laws coming into play the first of the year (a tax which should be abolished entirely for everyone. Don't get me started...), our estate lawyer said it might be a good time to review the paperwork.
Good thing we died. I mean did.
The thing I worry about most is who'll take care of the kids in the event of our untimely death should that occur. I actually worry about it a lot. Every time just the wife and I are driving anywhere, I can't help but think we could be taken out in a heartbeat by some driver who decides to get in a head on collision with us (not unlike Christopher Walken in Annie Hall).
Of course, it's easy (or easier anyway) to talk about in the abstract. When we really start discussing who'll take care of the kids when we're gone, there are a lot of things to consider. Not so much financially, because we've put that in place for them. But who would raise them similarly, if not exactly, the way we would? With the same values we share. Who are the ones who will offer them the kind of unconditional love they'll need after the tragedy of our passing?
Seriously, I just light up a room don't I?
The other thing is just because we've named someone to take them now doesn't mean they'll be able or want to when the time comes. That's why we have several nominees: if one declines, they move on to the next name on the list.
We're fortunate to have a lot of very good friends who would be excellent guardians of our children. Many of them with bigger houses and pools. Now that I'm thinking about it, the kids may not think we're the only ones who've died and gone to heaven.
The other part of this document is the Power Of Attorney for major health related decisions. My wife and I both hold it for each other. Which means basically we have to stay on good behavior, or the other one can choose to pull the plug if given the option.
At least that's how it was explained to me.
Believing it's best to be straight with the kids, we've told them who they could wind up with and in what order we'd like it to happen. They're good with it. A little too good. In fact I've asked them if they could act just a little more broken up at the thought we might be gone.
They said they'd think about it.
So for now, we're all up to date with our final wishes. I even got the part about dressing me in a black tee shirt and jeans, and having an iPod playing Thunder Road to take me into eternity written into the document.
In the most literal sense, we're good to go.
