Can we talk?

It's easy to take cheap shots at Joan Rivers. What with all the plastic surgeries that've gone both right and wrong, the raspy voice, the machine gun delivery of her material and the tacky red carpet shows, she practically invites it.

Plus she's been known to take a few cheap shots of her own (if you don't believe me, Google "Elizabeth Taylor fat jokes Joan Rivers"). All of that makes it easy to forget what Joan Rivers really is.

A pioneer woman.

Without her, there's no Sarah Silverman, Roseanne, Kathy Griffin or dozens of other female comics. Women like her, along with Phyllis Diller, broke through a comedy barrier by doing three things. Having great material, persistence and ignoring the fact there was a barrier at all.

There's no doubt that she's a polarizing figure. Her jokes seem to have gotten more pointed as she's gotten older. Or maybe she just continues to prove what a genuinely unfrightened comedian she really is.

And if she goes off the rails or crosses the line occasionally, she's earned the right to be forgiven for it.

Yesterday, during a routine procedure on her vocal chords, she stopped breathing and was rushed to an ER a mile away. On the way she went into full cardiac arrest, but the EMT's were able to bring her back. As of this writing, she's in serious but stable condition, and in a medically induced coma.

Love her or hate her, Joan Rivers legacy is every comedian who came after her, every woman (and man) she inspired to stand up at a mic and make people laugh.

She's also, like Don Rickles, the last of a breed of comedian from the golden age.

The night before her surgery scare, she joked to an audience, "I'm 81. I could go at any minute."

Let's hope not.

Blackhawk down

Sometimes you read a story that hits so hard the sadness is more than you can bear.

That's what happened to me today when I read about Wes Leonard.

Wes was a 16-year old high school student and star athlete at Fennville High in Michigan. He'd just scored the winning basket at a championship game, putting his team - the Fennville Blackhawks - at an undefeated 20 - 0 for the season.

Seconds after the winning shot and the ensuing celebration, the crowd watched in horror as Wes collapsed on the court and died. He'd gone into cardiac arrest from an enlarged heart, had a massive heart attack and was likely gone before he hit the floor.

I don't know any other way to see this except through the eyes of his parents. I have a son. I know how anxious I feel when he's not home. I can't even comprehend him never coming home again.

I never want to.

Anxiety is the by-product of having kids that they don't tell you about. It's the one you don't read about in "What To Expect When You're Expecting", or Dr. Spock.

It's not in the small print.

We want our kids to be safe in the world, and realize that for the most part they are. But there's always a soundtrack, a white noise playing in the background of your thoughts that something horrible will happen or is happening to them when they're out of your sight.

Of course, we all have to live with a certain amount of denial or we could never get through the day. We'd never be able to cross a street for fear of getting hit by a car, or plug in a toaster for fear of being electrocuted. We choose to ignore the noise because it's just a silly thought. And it'll never happen.

Until it does.

I used to enjoy movies like Ransom or Without A Trace. Now I can't even watch them, because when I do all I think about is how my kids could disappear that fast.

From all accounts, Wes Leonard was a great kid on and off the court. My heart goes out to his friends and family, but most of all his parents.

Tonight I'll be saying a prayer for all of them. While his life was cut tragically short, his memory will live on forever in the hearts of everyone who knew him.

And every parent who didn't.