Things I was wrong about: FasTrak

Continuing my wildly popular yet rarely acclaimed series of Things I Was Wrong About, we now add to remote controls, GPS and butt heaters the FasTrak lane on the 110 freeway.

Years ago, I worked at a small (minded) agency in Orange County that had The Toll Roads. The agency is no longer around, but the Toll Roads are. To use them, you need a FasTrak transponder loaded up with cash credits from a credit card. Sensors on the freeway read it as you fly by and deduct the toll automatically.

This was all well and good for private toll roads, but when the city of L.A. decided to try it on the carpool lanes on the Harbor Freeway - 110 to you and me - I was against it.

My thinking was I'm a taxpayer, and damn it those lanes should be mine, dare I say all of ours, free of charge. It was just another instance of the man keeping me down. And by down I mean gridlocked.

But I should've known better to stand, or sit, between the city and a lucrative revenue stream.

It only took one instance of being late to a show at the Music Center because of traffic to get me thinking maybe I should give this FasTrak thing a try.

Here's what I discovered: the carpool lanes, now called Metro Express Lanes, totally rock. More importantly, they roll.

The price is based on time of day and how congested the freeway is. Most of the time, if I have two or more people in the car, there's no charge to use the lane. I set the transponder to one, two or three riders. And to keep me honest, they have cameras to check how many people are actually in my car if there's a dispute.

It's become like anything else I pay for by having money withdrawn automatically - once I bit the bullet, my wallet didn't even feel it.

Plus, with as much business and as many appointments and lunches that I have in L.A., it's paid for itself several times over in time saved.

Sure I feel the hostility from other drivers not in the express lanes, as they just sit with their cars idling, inhaling exhaust and working on their hand gestures.

But as I fly by, blasting E Street Radio and getting where I need to be on time, I'm in sort of a fugue state. I don't even notice them anymore.

I'll say it because it's true: I was wrong about using FasTrak.

If you feel the need for speed, velcro that little sucker to your windshield and get moving.

My new favorite teacher

I'm not going to bury the lead, I'll just come right out with it. My new favorite teacher is Mr. Hayashino. I say new favorite, because I just met him tonight for the first time at my daughter's high school Back To School Night.

If you don't have kids you may not be familiar with Back To School Night. Almost every school has one. It happens at the beginning of the school year, usually on a night there's a major sporting event or a television program you've been waiting three months to see.

Parents follow their child's curriculum, going from class to class between bells, cramming ourselves in the students' chairs and listening to their teachers give an overview of who they are, what they teach and what they expect from both us and the students.

They have ten minutes to do it before the bell rings and everyone hustles onto the next class.

Tonight, I met my daughter's chemistry teacher, Mr. Hayashino. I know, I said chemistry. I'm sure for those of you who follow this blog with any kind of regularity, you already see where this is going. And it's going exactly where you think it is.

I'm not sure what Mr. Hayashino was saying during his allotted ten minutes. I was busy looking at the Periodic Chart, trying to find the element symbols that spelled Felina, which as I'm sure you know was the name of the series finale episode of Breaking Bad.

When the bell rang, I went up to Mr. Hayashino, introduced myself and asked if he'd watched Breaking Bad since it's required viewing for chemistry teachers. He said he saw the series - all of it - for the first time this summer. I told him I'd binged it six times. He was duly impressed.

We immediately started talking about chemicals, cooks and how we have to get together and talk some more about the show. Twist my arm.

So this semester, I'm going to be taking a keen interest in how my daughter is doing in school. I'll monitor her progress, and talk to the teachers when necessary.

When I get to her chemistry class again, I'll ask the teacher, "Who the hell are you?"

And if Mr. Hayashino's the chemistry teacher I think he is, I'm pretty sure his answer will be, "You know who I am. You all know. Now say my name."

Roll 'em Roll 'em Roll 'em

They're everywhere. In jars on the bookshelf, glass bowls on the dresser, the bottom of drawers and jean pockets.

Pennies. The Fredo of the coin world.

I've always been a big proponent of change (SWIDT?). Especially since I drive a car that has a special compartment for it. Armed with quarters, nickels and dimes, I fear no parking meter.

The problem is the thing I use change for the most I can't use pennies for. I know there's a movement to do away with the penny. But I'm not for it.

After all, what will we leave for the next person in that little plastic dish at the car wash and liquor store if we banish the penny? It's a cheap way of feeling like you're doing something good for someone else without actually doing anything good for them.

I know it costs more to make a penny than the penny's worth, but I don't believe that's the issue.I believe it's an organizational problem. So I decided to be an example for my family and the nation by doing something about it.

Today I took all my pennies and dumped them on the bed. Then, counting in two's fifty-cents at a time, I rolled them into bank coin sleeves.

I wound up with $3.50. That's 350 pennies. See how easy math is with pennies?

I even found a relatively rare 1956 D penny in the pile. Depending on which eBay listing you believe, it's worth either $1.60 or $498. I choose to believe the second one.

I'd be curious to know how many people think the same way as I do about pennies.

And I'll bet you know exactly how much I'll pay for your thoughts on it.

No joke

If you haven't seen the trailer for next years' Suicide Squad, have a gander at it here.

Besides looking awesome, and making people forget Will Smith starred in After Earth, the trailer reveals the next incarnation of the Joker, frighteningly played by Jared Leto.

I was never a Leto fan, and in fact he wasn't even on my radar until I saw his brilliant performance in Dallas Buyers Club (btw,I was among the first to call Oscars for McConaughey and Leto).

I was also a purist, of the belief no one could ever come close to Heath Ledger's embodiment of the Joker in The Dark Knight. At least right up until I heard Leto had been cast. The casting director deserves an Oscar for this one.

The look of joy and glee on Leto's face as he delivers his memorable, quotable and infinitely creepy line in the trailer gives me chills every time I watch it.

The line is "I'm not gonna kill you. I'm just gonna hurt you really, really bad."

Which, if you work in an agency, may have a slightly familiar ring to it.

Remaining faithful

It's like Groundhog's Day.

Every September, Apple introduces the newest iPhone along with a few other products or improvements.

Then, online and in person, the Apple faithful show up in droves a couple weeks later to snap them up so they can have bragging rights to being among the early adopters of Apple's latest.

ME: Hi, my name is Jeff and I'm an Apple loyalist. ALL: Hi Jeff.

I love the annual show. From the year's worth of rumors leading up to it, to the pre-show music (all of it available on iTunes), to Apple's vice-president of Software Engineering Craig Federighi's humor-filled and loose presentation, to the products themselves, it all works for me. And on me.

I have an ancient iPhone5 I waited two months and went to seven Apple stores to get when it first came out. For those of you keeping count, that means as of today's presentation I'm three generations behind on the iPhone. I want the new iPhone6S Plus. But I probably won't get it.

Instead, I'll wait for next year's song and dance when they introduce the iPhone7. I like buying in the non-"S" years.

Whenever the subject of iPad comes up, between my laptop and my iPhone I've never been able to find a reason to hop on the iPad bandwagon. But I did want one after today's introduction of the 12.9" iPad Pro. It has an available Smart Keyboard for $169 to make it more like a laptop, and a $100 Apple Pencil which is their way of saying stylus.

However when I use the calculator on my ole' iPhone5 and add up exactly how much all this new gear would cost me - and add in the fact I now have tuition for young Mr. Spielberg, plus the wife and daughter are waiting for their new phones - it becomes painfully clear I'm going to have to wring (or ring) a little more use out of what I have.

Hey Siri, couldn't you cut me a little slack and make it every two years?

Happy Labor Day

We're into the long weekend, and tomorrow is Labor Day. So what better time to celebrate by listening to some fine music celebrating the tone and spirit of this deserved holiday that honors this country's Labor movement and the working men and woman who led it.

Alright, not all of these songs actually honor the movement - some have a little fun with it.

From Elvis to Alabama, maybe you'll know a few of these. If you do, or even if you don't, please to enjoy. And be sure to make the most of your holiday weekend.

You worked hard for it.

The fine print

Today I made an investment I'd managed to put off for years. I bought a new printer for the house.

The old printer was a HP Photosmart C8180, and it served us well for a long time. But as it got older, it would occasionally freeze up under the stress of all the work it had to churn out. Something I can definitely relate to.

Then there was that obsolete thing. With the advent of Apple AirPrint, which was not one of its capabilities, it was only a matter of time before it was taking the big dirtnap.

The good news is the price of printers has continually come down, and the technology loaded into them has steadily increased. The bad news is - and this is an odd complaint - is there are too damn many to choose from. HP. Cannon. Brother. Epson. Lexmark (never a contender). Each company making at least ten to choose from, running the gamut from inexpensive to need a co-signer.

The determining factor on price is features. Paper feeder? Yes please. Automatic double side printing? Twice the fun. 12 pages per minute? If you say so. AirPrint? How did I ever live without it.

I didn't have the cash on hand for both the new MacBook Pro I need and the new iPhone being announced next week. But I did have the $99 bucks for a new HP OfficeJet 5740 (actually I just poured a little more gas on the American Express card).

So I feel like I at least got to upgrade something.

The setup however didn't go quite as smoothly as I'd hoped. It had trouble connecting to my wireless network. I thought it'd automatically say, "Oh, Jeff's network, where you been all my life?" Not so much.

Seems I was running on a 5Ghz network, and the printer is only 2.4Ghz capable. With the help of HP Tech Support I was chatting with, who at one point told me I needed to be patient (I got your patient right here...), I created a new 2.4Ghz network for the printer to hook up with. I know, right?

Now everything's working swell, and the new printer's spitting out paper like it just took a swig of Zima.

I wonder if it'll let me print out the loan documents I'll need for the ink cartridges.