Goodbye Brian Dennehy

I've mentioned before I was a theater arts major. You may have see my work in one of the early Sprint commercials. The director was Robert Lieberman, who used to be married to Mary Lou Henner. To this day, I believe I got the part because, at the time, I looked freakishly like him - so much so that everyone on the shoot thought I was his brother. It's always been a who you know town—or in my case, who you look like.

Even so, it wasn't enough to keep me from being cut from the spot before it aired. What was particularly depressing was I knew the editor who was cutting the spot, and she did everything she could to keep me in it, but no luck.

Showbiz. AmIrite?

Anyway, during those days I used to like to meet friends at The Palm for drinks. One time I arrived early, so I took a seat at the bar and ordered a screwdriver while I was waiting. Next to me, chatting with the bartender, was this big, loud, very funny guy who I heard but wasn't paying much attention to until he told a joke I couldn't help but overhear and laugh at.

He turned to me and said, "You liked that one?" It was Brian Dennehy.

Even before that encounter I was a fan of his. He was what I like to call a money-in-the-bank actor. Meaning you could never go wrong casting him in anything.

The wife and I had the extraordinary pleasure of seeing his towering performance as Willie Loman in Arthur Miller's Death Of A Salesman. I don't remember how many years ago it was, but the performance still haunts me. He won a Tony for it. He should have won all of them.

Brian Dennehy died a few days ago, and it didn't get nearly the press it would have if not for the virus that's taking up the news cycle 24/7. But if you've ever seen him in Cocoon, First Blood, Tommy Boy, Presumed Innocent or many others, you already know how big a talent has been lost.

Thank you for sharing your talent, and for the conversation at the bar. I'll never forget either.

Rest in peace.

Back to bed. Again.

Sometime about three years ago, I posted this piece about my disdain for morning and almost everything related to it. I thought it might be a good time to revisit it because now, in this strange time, I can sleep in as late as I like and I'm able.

I have great admiration for all those working from home and maintaining their morning routines of early to rise, then getting dressed and ready for work so they look sharp and alert for their morning Zoom conference call.

I know we're all in this together, and I want you know I stand with you.

On everything but this part.

I am many things. Funny. Good looking. Talented. Creative. Compassionate. Encouraging. Well read. Kind to children. Nice to the waitstaff. A catch as a husband. Someone who loves doing laundry. And loading a dishwasher. A good friend. A trusted confidante. An excellent driver. A great kisser. And definitely humble.

However one thing I am not now, nor have I ever been, is a morning person.

Mornings are just a cruel tease. Being a late night person, I rarely get to sleep before midnight or one in the morning. I say sleep in the loosest sense of the word. It's been years, literally, since I've slept eight hours straight through. I get up to pee. Or I startle awake from a dream. Sometimes I'm just restless and watch some TV at three in the morning to take the edge off (because nothing takes the edge off like skin care and exercise equipment infomercials). Occasionally my eighty-five pound German Shepherd launches himself up on the bed in the middle of the night.

That gets the old ticker going.

Oddly enough, one thing that never, and I do mean never, keeps me awake is work. I think it comes from so many years as a freelancer. But the second both feet are out of the office, I don't think about anything related to work until I have to be back the next morning.

And we know how I feel about mornings.

The point of all this, and there is one, is that right around the time the faintest sliver of sunlight starts to hit the pitch black night sky is the exact moment I actually manage to get myself back to the deep, still sleep I've been craving all night. It finally arrives just in time for sunrise. Ironically when I'm finally completely out, it's time to wake up.

There's no gradual, gentle, coming-up-from-the-bottom-of-the-pool kind of awakening for me. Because I know how deep asleep I am in the morning, the alarm has to be more than a light bell, chirping birds or a digital alarm. No, my iPhone alarm is Uptown Funk. It comes on loud, and it's a straight up jolt out of bed. In fact, I have to kiss myself I'm so pretty (see what I did there?).

So if you see me at work in the morning around nine, dragging myself around, looking somewhat foggy and I don't return your smile or your hello, don't ask how you're doing or what you're working on, please don't take it personally. I promise I will.

Sometime around eleven.

Roll 'em Roll 'em Roll 'em - again

Here's the thing. In the never ending journey to be productive during the lockdown, I decided to start rolling all the spare change I have cluttering up my dresser top, jean pockets and random dishes around the house.

Then I thought it might be a fun blogpost. That's when I remembered it was a fun blogpost because I wrote about this very subject about five years ago.

And of course, being big on not reinventing the wheel and wanting to get back to bingeing Breaking Bad (again), instead of writing a whole new post I thought you'd enjoy reliving the joy, humor and insight of this one. I know I will.

It's the blogpost that keeps on giving. Don't be surprised if you see it again when we're in month six of self-quarantining. Please to enjoy.

They're everywhere. In jars on the bookshelf, glass bowls on the dresser, the bottom of drawers and jean pockets.

Pennies. The Fredo of the coin world.

I've always been a big proponent of change (SWIDT?). Especially since I drive a car that has a special compartment for it. Armed with quarters, nickels and dimes, I fear no parking meter.

The problem is the thing I use change for the most I can't use pennies for. I know there's a movement to do away with the penny. But I'm not for it.

After all, what will we leave for the next person in that little plastic dish at the car wash and liquor store if we banish the penny? It's a cheap way of feeling like you're doing something good for someone else without actually doing anything good for them.

I know it costs more to make a penny than the penny's worth, but I don't believe that's the issue.I believe it's an organizational problem. So I decided to be an example for my family and the nation by doing something about it.

Today I took all my pennies and dumped them on the bed. Then, counting in two's fifty-cents at a time, I rolled them into bank coin sleeves.

I wound up with $3.50. That's 350 pennies. See how easy math is with pennies?

I even found a relatively rare 1956 D penny in the pile. Depending on which eBay listing you believe, it's worth either $1.60 or $498. I choose to believe the second one.

I'd be curious to know how many people think the same way as I do about pennies.

And I'll bet you know exactly how much I'll pay for your thoughts on it.

Maskmaker Maskmaker

So I don't know about you, but since the COVID-19 pandemic has been hitting its stride, I've been alternating between devouring every bit of news about it that I can, and going days without letting myself hear a word. The second choice is the more relaxing one.

Anyway, today's been a news on day. And as a result, I've been spending a lot of time watching YouTube videos on how to make a mask—excuse me, face covering—at home without having to actually sew one.

Not that I couldn't. A couple years ago I took a sewing class with my friend Cassie, and while I never completed the apron we were making, I did learn enough to stitch up the sides of a mask. It's just that I don't want to, because I'm all about easy. I'd much prefer to have someone make one for me.

So that's the origin story of this reworked version of Matchmaker from Fiddler On The Roof.

In case you're not familiar with the song, here's the video. And once you can't get it out of your head, you'll be ready to sing the new lyrics to it below.

Meanwhile, I'll be looking to repurpose my Elvis bandana into a rockin' mask.

Maskmaker maskmaker make me a mask

Find one for me, that is your task

Maskmaker maskmaker start sewing for me

And make me the perfect mask

Maskmaker maskmaker I’ll bring the cloth

You do your work, I’ll drink some broth

Make me a mask for I’m longing to be

The envy of all I see

For papa, make it safe and effective

For mama, make it pretty and tight

For me well, I wouldn’t holler

In fact I would wear it all day and night

Maskmaker maskmaker make me a mask

Find one for me, that is your task

Day after day I don’t go out alone

So make me a mask all my own

Closing time

My heart is broken. As a result of the virus and the new world order, one of my favorite restaurants in the world is closing. I first wrote this post about five years ago to the day. And if anything, I love this place even more now than I did then. And as you'll see, I loved it a lot then.

I feel terrible for the entire Walt's Wharf family—chefs, waitstaff, hosts, bartenders. There was never one minute where I didn't feel welcomed and wanted.

It's become a perfect storm for the seafood restaurant (and many others). Because of this bitch virus, the governor's stay-at-home directive and the very real uncertainty of how long they'd have to stay closed, the business simply wasn't sustainable. So after 50 years, 50 years!, they've been forced to shut their doors for good.

I can't remember all the lunch meetings, family dinners and special occasions that were celebrated there. But I'll never forget the meals and the hospitality. I just wish I'd know the last meal I had there was going to be the last meal I had there.

In my dream life, some rich benefactor comes in and saves Walt's Wharf and it just keeps on going. But dreams are just that.

As a certain gravel-voiced singer from New Jersey I'm fond of says in one of his songs, "Is a dream a lie that don't come true, or is it something worse?"

In this case, it is.

Thanks for everything Walt's Wharf. Dining out definitely won't be the same without you.

Sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name. Then, sometimes, you want to go where no one knows your name but you want to go there anyway.

I like to think of myself as someone who likes to mix it up every now and again. Who maintains an air of unpredictability. An edge of danger. I keep spontenaity alive.

I also like to think of myself as six-foot three, one eighty, blond and ripped. But that's not happening either.

Come to find out I'm actually a creature of habit. Today we met some friends for lunch at one of my favorite places, Walt's Wharf in Seal Beach. It's been there forever, and it's always great. At least what I always order is. Because despite a wide variety of fresh seafood, and a wine selection second to none, I have the exact same meal every time I eat there.

Cup of clam chowder with Tabasco. Small Walt's salad with a salmon filet on top. Iced tea. I wanted you to know in case you're buying.

It's a sure thing every time. The problem is I feel like I should try something else. Logic would tell me if my usual choice is so good, other items must be just as good if not better. On the heels of that, I think this meal makes me happy and what am I so worried about.

Besides, since when did I start living my life according to logic? Not a Vulcan, hello.

I'm not going to say feeling bad for having the same great meal at a nice seafood restaurant is a first world problem, but, you know, draw your own conclusions.

Here's what I'm trying to say. If you want to meet me for lunch at Walt's, and you happen to be in a hurry, don't worry. I know what I'm having.

A show of hands

It's not easy being beautiful during a plague. I mean sure, I make it look easy, but it's really not. Basically I've had to cut down my beauty regimen to just one essential element. And you're looking at it.

I've mentioned here before that I've always washed my hands like I was Howard Hughes. But in the last crazy, unnerving, scary, germ-infested, toilet paper and Clorox wipes hoarding weeks, I'd say I've at a minimum doubled my already ridiculous hand-washing routine.

After touching every doorknob.

Handling every piece of mail.

Taking off a pair of my disposable pink latex gloves (just because it's a plague doesn't mean I can't make a fashion statement).

When I'm done handling dirty dishes.

After I pet the dogs.

And that's just for starters.

As you'd imagine, all that increased volume of hot city water leave my hands more than a little raw. That's why I turn to Bamboo Bergamot from Dani Naturals.

I stumbled on to this fabulous hydrating lotion when I was out to breakfast at the Coffee Cup Cafe with the wife and kids.

The wait, as always, was ridiculously long. So, as always, we wandered into Twig & Willow, the sweet little boutique store next door while we waited. My daughter likes going in there because she's sure she'll walk out with something to wear in the way of clothing or jewelry, thanks to her old man. What can I say? I'm a pushover for my girly.

Anyway, on one of the shelves was a plethora of hand and body lotions with a tester bottle for each of one.

I've found that in shopping, as in life, it's always good to sniff before you buy.

I took a whiff of the Bamboo Bergamot and I was hooked. Its scent was actually reminiscent of the shampoo I used to steal, er, use at the Hotel Del Coronado before it sold and they changed suppliers. It used to be this great fresh, ocean scent. After the sale it was some kind of citrus whammy jammy. Seaside hotel, hello?! Don't get me started.

The good news is unlike toilet paper, disinfectant sprays and wipes, bottles of Bamboo Bergamot are in plentiful supply online. I highly recommend it for keeping your hands and skin silky smooth, hydrated and on the right side of the law, aromatically speaking.

I know there are more pressing issues in the new world order right now. But let's remember the time will come again when we'll get back to being close enough to smell each other.

My advice? Apply liberally.

Branching out

What you're looking at here is a stunning tree called a Forest Pansy. Its different color leaves throughout the year make it as unpredictable as it is beautiful.

You might be able to tell from the skateboards, barbecue and dog poop scooper against the fence that this particular picture didn't come from Homes & Gardens. Nope, in fact this is my very own back yard.

I've always loved the Forest Pansy tree. And on day 2 of hunkering down and self-isolating, I thought I'd wander out back and have a look at this tree since it always makes me happy. I can't help but notice the colorful heart-shaped blooming buds (Note to Rich Siegel: Heart Shaped Blooming Buds, Roxy '07), the shape of the crown, the slight bend in the trunk where it leans towards the sun.

Apparently what I failed to notice is this branch sticking out like the Night King's spear over the walkway.

I finally saw it when I turned around from the other side and walked right into it. Fortunately I wear spectacles (OSHA would be so proud) so it didn't take my eye out.

What it did do was gash my gigantic forehead (ad space available - great rates!). I hardly gave a thought to the fact this open bleeding wound on my forehead was like a big welcome sign for the coronavirus. I can only hope the tree isn't contagious.

I'm not sure, but I don't think this blatant Forest Pansy attack will leave a scar. Growing up on the mean streets of West L.A.—north of Wilshire—I already have enough of them.

So while we ride out the coronavirus storm sequestered in the house, I'll still look at the tree and admire its beauty and calming spirit.

Except maybe I'll do it through the window.