It's been awhile since I posted my Guilty Pleasures series which, ironically, is a guilty pleasure in itself. The last one, I don't have to tell you, was Paddington 2. It was a fine addition to others in the Guilty Pleasures universe, keeping good company with films like the Final Destination movies, Breakdown, The Faculty, Carrie, Devil's Advocate and the ever popular Three Stooges.
Anyway, as much as they all might want to, the truth is not every movie will qualify for the honor. But while all of them got there for different reasons, the chances of being included are exponentially increased if the film has plenty of B movie dialog, A movie action, big budget special effects and a well-known character actor who wanders into critical scenes just in time to crack wise.
This one meets all the criteria—including the last thanks to Jeffrey Dean Morgan—without breaking an action/adventure sweat. I'm talking about Rampage.
For those keeping track, Rampage is the second Dwayne Johnson film to make it into the GP series. The first was San Andreas. I don't know exactly what it is about Dwayne Johnson, besides the fact we're so similarly built. It's like looking in a mirror.
Anyway, the beginning of the movie sounds like the start of a joke: an albino gorilla, an alligator and a wolf walk into canisters from outer space. Seems there was illegal testing by a gene-editing company that was so wrong, it had to be done in the space station. But of course, as we learned years ago, in space no one can hear you scream.
When one of the experiments goes south, the last surviving crew member makes a weightless dash for the escape pod—but not before she's instructed by her evil overloads to bring the merchandise they were testing back with her.
I know this will come as a surprise, but the journey home doesn't go exactly as planned. The samples come crashing back to earth, the gorilla, alligator and wolf get a whiff of whatever's leaking out of them, then all hell breaks loose. All three start growing faster than Baywatch was pulled from theaters. Fortunately, Dwayne works in something like CSI: Primate for the San Diego Zoo where the gorilla escaped from, and already has a relationship (not that kind) with him.
By the way, the gorilla's name is George. Curious isn't it?
I won't spoil much more of it. But if you're thinking these oversized plush toys wreak havoc on the city, kill lots of people, flip a lot of cars and can only be stopped by Dwayne Johnson, you're not too far off. See it during the day, pay matinee prices and go be mindlessly entertained for a couple hours.
I'd tell you what it's more fun than, but I have a feeling you already know.
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