It was January 2016, and we were only a few weeks past losing Max, the world’s greatest dog. I’d been saying loudly and repeatedly I wasn’t going to be ready for another dog for a long while, and I didn’t want to hear any conversation about racing out to replace Max (as if any dog could ever replace him).
Fast forward three and half weeks. I started scrolling the Westside German Shepherd Rescue website and came across Gus. He looked like an awesome dog, and bore quite the resemblance to Max. And since WGSR was having an open house soon, I thought what would be the harm In going down there and shaking paws with Gus in person.
So on a Saturday morning, with the wife and daughter in the living room in their jammies watching a leftover Hallmark Channel Christmas movie, which explains why I have no recollection of it, I came bursting in fully showered, dressed and ready to go.
”Where are we going?”
”Downtown to the Westside German Shepherd Rescue. Just to look.”
I’d never had a rescue dog and was curious about it and what the dogs were like. Max had been a German import: a true German German Shepherd we had since he was a puppy. I thought if we ever got a rescue, it'd be strange not to know who he was from the time he was a puppy, but it might be nice to have one that came housebroken, with adult teeth and without an appetite for couches and pillows.
At the open house, Gus was beautiful but scared, as many of the dogs were. Clearly he'd had an abusive prior owner and was fearful of people, particularly men. This is true of a lot of rescue dogs. When you see these beautiful dogs recoil and put their tail between their legs when you try to pet them, it makes you hope there’s a deep, dark circle in hell for people who abuse these animals.
Anyway, after meeting Gus, another shepherd named Jake and a couple others, we were ready to head back home. The woman at WSGR who’d been doing the introductions, and seeing we weren’t having much luck, asked us what we were looking for. We basically described another Max. She said, “Hang on, I have someone I want you to meet.”
She went in back, and a few minutes later came out with Ace.
He was beautiful. Where Max’s eyes had been dark, Ace’s were light brown and a little freaky looking. Max had smaller triangle-shaped ears, and Ace had two giant ears sticking straight up that we figured could pick up 300 channels. Max was a long-haired German Shepherd. Ace was a short hair.
We spent some time with Ace, walked with him a bit and then let my daughter walk him. She got down to eye level with him, where he proceeded to put his giant paw in her hand and give her face a sloppy, paint roller size licking.
That did it. We were at the point of no return.
Ace was our beautiful boy for six years. Every German Shepherd bonds with a person, and in Ace's case it was my wife. He was her shadow, her protector, her love, following her everywhere and always having to know where she was and what she was doing.
If she'd had plans for a life going to the bathroom alone, Ace put an end to them.
About three years ago, we discovered in the most terrifying way that Ace had epilepsy. I've posted about it here, so I won't revisit all the gory details now. We managed his seizures, which would run few and far between and then, for no reason, frighteningly close to each other.
Last Friday, Ace had a seizure that medically and behaviorally altered him in a way he couldn't come back from. So we made the decision every pet owner dreads, and knows they'll have to make eventually. As my friend Scott Thomson says, "They're angels with expiration dates."
We wanted to make his send off as lovely, if that's a word you can use, as possible for him. We gave him an In-N-Out burger-double patty (but not a Double Double cause of the cheese - he was an all meat guy). We leashed him up and took him for a long walk around the neighborhood, where he got in all his usual sniffs and explorations. When he got back to the house, he enjoyed some whipped cream his favorite way: straight from the can. He was in good spirits.
Instead of a cold veterinary office, we had a vet come to the house and said our goodbyes through our tears in the backyard. We were all down on the ground around him, holding him and making sure he knew how much we loved him.
Right now I imagine Ace and Max having a conversation about how the wife, daughter and I were as dog owners.
ACE: Did he do that stupid treat-in-his-mouth thing with you?
MAX: All the time! But it made him happy so I put up with it.
ACE: He'd always brag about how we'd never rip his face off.
MAX: Good thing he wasn't a mind reader!
ACE and MAX laugh hysterically.
Ace was the strong, silent type. And without his giant presence and even bigger heart, now the house is silent.
We'll miss his manly sighs when he laid his powerful body down. The way he looked up at you with his "Don't you love me?" face whenever we held anything edible in our hands. The look on his face when he'd lay dreaming on the love seat. His joyful howling when he knew he was going on a walk.
We're going to miss every little thing about him, and we'll love him forever.
Most people get one great dog in their life if they're lucky. As the wife said, we definitely exceeded our quota.
ACE: Who're all these treats and giant bones for?
MAX: They're for us pal!
ACE: Do we take them over that bridge right now?
MAX: Not yet. We're going to wait here awhile.
4 comments:
Jeff, what a beautiful tribute to your well-loved boy. You were all lucky to share time with each other. Ah, pets. The greatest loves and heartbreaks of our lives.
Awww! Tears in my eyes. I must have missed your posts about Ace having epilepsy. So glad he found you guys! My Molly is 14 and I’m a little worried every day. Sending hugs.
Lovely, Jeff. I hope that hole in your hearts grows smaller by the day. You clearly gave Ace a lot to brag about up there. Yup. Hugging my dogs whole I can.
Lovely.
Lovely, Jeff. I hope that hole in your hearts grows smaller by the day. You clearly gave Ace a lot to brag about to his next family. As if there could ever be another.
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