My Jesus moment

It was a genuine turn-the-other-cheek moment.

Yesterday I took my son and daughter to see the new movie Thor. If you've seen the lead actor in the ads, you know he's tanned and has long blonde hair.

I call him Malibu Thor.

And if you've seen me, you know how incredibly similar Thor and I are built. I swear, during the scene where he had his shirt off it was like looking in the mirror.

But I digress.

Anyway, we cut it close getting to the theater in time, but were lucky enough to get three seats just a couple steps up the stadium-seating theater. I sat on the aisle.

At some point early on in the movie, I noticed a father with a young baby in his arms come down and stand in the hallway to the theater, just the other side of the rail for the stairs up to the seats. After a little while, his baby started banging on the rail, and frankly the reverberation of the metal every time his kid hit it wasn't enhancing the soundtrack in the slightest.

After letting this go on for a longer time than was reasonable, I leaned over to the dad and politely asked in a whisper if he could stop his baby from banging the rail. With that, he turned to me, bouncing his baby in his arms, and said, loudly, "He's just a kid man. F&#k you!"

Needless to say, not the response I was expecting.

Two things immediately went through my mind: first, it's going to be interesting to hear baby's first words when he's old enough to speak. Second, since I had my kids next to me, and they (and most of the theater) heard the entire exchange, this might be an excellent teaching/learning moment for them.

So instead of engaging this moron, I just kind of laughed it off and returned to watching Malibu Thor. When I did this, I noticed that he retreated back a bit, and moved his baby out of banging range of the rail. He didn't say another word to me, and stood there for the entire film, scared his baby was going to start crying in the theater.

Personally, I don't see why. What is it about seeing an ear-shattering, violent movie about the warrior Norse God of Thunder that would make an 8-month old baby cry?

When I got up to go to the bathroom and walked right by them, I realized I had about 60 lbs. on the guy. He saw me get up, and took a step back as I came around to pass him. When the movie ended, his wife came down from wherever she was sitting, and they quickly left without giving me another glance.

Now, I work in advertising. Believe me it's not the first time I've been F-bombed. But I was proud of myself for going completely against my true nature and not engaging with the guy.

Like I said, a genuine turn-the-other-cheek moment.

By doing so, I had returned the compliment without ever having to say it.

Plus my kids got to see that you don't have to engage every asshole who comes at you.

So all and all, an interesting and educational afternoon at the movies.

Of course, if I'm being honest with myself - which I so rarely do because where's the upside in that - I know if my kids weren't with me, this is probably the Jesus I would have followed.

Chrome wheeled, fuel injected

There's not much to be said about taking my car in for service. It's time consuming. It's expensive. It means I actually have to talk to people who work at the dealership. The rewards of doing it - aside from getting my car back with the problem (sometimes) solved - are few and far between.

However, there is one benefit I always look forward to.

The loaner car.

Since I drive a Lexus, I usually get a pretty nice loaner. It's almost always a step up from my model, and it always has something my car doesn't: satellite radio.

The reason that brings me so much joy is it means I get to listen to E Street Radio. All Bruce all the time. It's a little bit of heaven for a Bruce tramp such as myself, who along with my other Bruce tramp pals live for the tours and chase him to stadiums and arenas all across the country and back to see him.

The beauty of Bruce is that even if I hear a song thirty times, each version is different in some way. Especially the concert versions E Street Radio frequently plays. There's always a new phrasing, different intonation, alternate name of "the girl" from the recorded version to pick up on.

The concerts they play - both official and the bootlegs - give a glimpse of the man as he's developing into the artist he is today. It's fascinating to listen as the sometimes silly banter of youth gives way to the thoughtfulness and insight that goes into the craft of a more mature Springsteen.

I personally can't imagine a better job than being an E Street Radio DJ and getting to listen to Bruce day in and day out.

Now, I know there are people who disagree with me. In fact, a good friend and colleague of mine thinks hosting a channel that only plays Bruce is a version of radio purgatory.

Of course, he's entitled to his opinion.

Even if it's wrong.

An eventful day

It's been eleven days since my last post. I usually don't let that much time go by between postings, but I thought there wasn't much happening I cared to write about so why write about nothing.

Besides, I've done that already.

Then I was listening to the Show Biz Beat on KROQ, and Ralph Garman started to run down celebrity birthdays for the day. And I started thinking a lot of other things must've happened on this day besides celebrities being born.

Come to find out that days, like used cars and my high school girlfriend, have a history all their own. Throughout the years, lots of things happened on them (see high school girlfriend joke).

Wikipedia has a site devoted to anniversaries of days and the events that transpired on them. For example, on this day, Reneé Zellweger was born, Art Fleming died (dead game show hosts for a hundred Alex), the integrated circuit was patented, DC Comics published its second major superhero (starts with a Bat, ends with a Man), and New York became the first state to require automobile license plates.

Although if you've ever driven in New York, you have to wonder why they bothered.

Anyway, that's just scratching the surface of what transpired on this day over the years. It's a good reminder that important things - life-changing events, technological advances, history-making decisions - are happening and have happened on each and every day I've ever lived. Even if I don't feel like anything is happening in my day.

Reading about everything that happened throughout history on this day had me thinking about doing a post about time travel.

Maybe another day.

Signing my life away

So remember the post about how I'd won a bid at auction for an LAPD ride-along? Well apparently the day is coming closer.

I thought I had until September to choose when I wanted to play cops and robbers (and gang members, and drug dealers....), but apparently the LAPD has a different timetable. Seems they want me to join them sometime in May. The date is still up to me, but just to expedite my decision making, I received the release I'll have to sign in order to do it.

Suddenly the term "signing my life away" has taken on a much more literal meaning. Ditto for the phrase "riding shotgun."

I've been thinking of this as a big adventure, which it will be. And while I've always known there's danger - or the potential of danger - involved, somehow I've managed to wish that thought out to the cornfield and just focus on the fact I get to ride around in a cop car for a few hours (it's the most focused I've been in years).

I'm thinking Tuesday, May 17th would be a good choice. My ride is supposed to be from 6:30 p.m. until 1:30 a.m., and it's going to be a full moon that night.

All sorts of crazy comes out on a full moon. We'll see what they think about that.

Meanwhile, I'd like my attorneys to start reviewing this release and find some loopholes.

Just in case they find me with some bulletholes.

The truth must be told

What with earthquakes, tsunamis, aftershocks, radioactive waste, wars in Iraq, Afghanistan and Libya, the federal budget crisis, tornadoes in Iowa, Americans detained in North Korea, rising gas prices and everything else going on in the world, I couldn’t stay quiet any longer. I decided it was time to finally have my voice heard.

About American Idol.

I’ve never watched it before this season. I’d seen a little of it here and there. Enough to wonder why Paula Abdul wasn’t in a padded room, and who hurt Simon so bad as a child.

But this year I've become vested in the show big time.

I’m not going to go down the list of contestants one by one (seriously, can’t Scotty McCreery sell that deep-singin’, face-muggin’, microphone pointin’, sideways-smilin’ country crap somewhere else?), but here’s where I come out on it.

And where I think the show will as well.

In the show before the finale, it'll come down to Casey, James and Lauren. Then Lauren, who is quite talented, will be eliminated. James, with his Tourette's syndrome and high functioning autism has been my favorite right from the start. But I also wouldn’t be upset if Casey walked away the winner.

I know these are bold statements in trying times, and there's bound to be shock, controversy and debate over these choices.

But that’s a good thing. It’s what makes America great.

That and the fact probably no one will vote for Hailey.

Kickstart someone's dream

When you go through life like I have, as an only child, you try not to laugh out loud when people around you say "how good giving feels." Any only child will tell you that giving just ain't natural, and the idea of sharing is crazy talk.

But there's always an exception to the rule. In my case, five exceptions.

I've discovered a website called Kickstarter.com. It's a site where creative people from all disciplines - film, design, writing, music, dance, photography - post their dream projects and ask you to help fund them.

They tell you about the project, and usually there's a short video describing it (like the ones below), and incentives based on how much you donate. It's an all or nothing proposition: if they don't reach their goal amount within the given time, the project doesn't get funded.

What I love about the site is these people are putting their dreams out there, asking you to be a part of making them come true. It doesn't take much to help. And go figure, it actually feels really good.

The other thing about the site is how inspiring it is. Seeing all these great projects makes me want to blow the dust off a few of my own and get them off the ground.

Gets the wheels spinning. It's a good thing.

So, because I'm a giver, here are the five, you heard me, five projects I'm backing so far.

Check out kickstarter.com, and see if there isn't someone's dream you can make come true.

Ready? Set? Wait.

My friend Janice, a swell writer with a blog of her own, used to have this sign in her office. I think she hoped it would work as a deterrent.

But she knew better. After all, she worked in an advertising agency.

Hurry up and wait is standard operating procedure at virtually every agency I’ve ever worked at. It usually falls somewhere between their mantra and their mission statement.

The philosophy manifests itself in several forms, and when it strikes it can happen quicker than Charlie Sheen going from $2 mil a week to zero.

The way it usually begins is they - you know, “they” - hastily assemble a team of whoever happens to be unlucky enough to be in the building.

Everyone is quickly gathered in a conference room that hasn’t been cleaned since the Eisenhower administration, and wreaks with the sweet perfume of cold cuts and bagels.

Serious as a heart attack, they brief everyone with the few threadbare morsels of information they got from a casual conversation with the client. Then they send everyone scrambling to do work that has to be presented in two days.

Two days! 48 hours!

“We’re pulling out all the stops on this one people!”

"This is our chance to make a real impact!"

"We won't have this chance again so it has to count!"

So, everyone puts on their thinking caps and scrambles.

And even though we cry like babies and complain like Rosie O'Donnell when the buffet is closed, we’re all professionals. After a round-the-clock coffee, pizza and cynicism fueled night, we deliver everything that’s been asked for: tv spots, web site, emails, print, radio scripts. The whole shootin’ match.

We present our work to extremely non-committal reactions, then wait to hear.

And wait.

And wait.

Oh, the meeting got pushed back? So you didn’t need it in two days? Uh huh.

Ah, and the client’s not sure he really has the budget to do the program? Huh. Might’ve been a good question to ask up front.

So you want us to wait, and you’ll get back to us on next steps.

Okay. We'll wait here.

What’s that you say? Maybe we can think about it some more until you decide what comes next.

Yeah. We'll get right on it.